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Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Entry #1

it was a cold winter day outside, and 18 year old walked into the local urgent care clinic.

He was kind of embarrassed, how he loved diapers enough to see if he could pay the clinic to change 

his diaper "like he was a baby." Praying inside that they would let him in and have him assigned a 

female nurse, He waited. All the paperwork and healthcare stuff took forever , and after he paid, the 

boy waited. It was rather awkward, because he'd get changed when his diaper was used and that 

could take a long time, and the fact he could have gotten kicked out for taking too much time 

did not help much. There were a lot of sick people who needed attention, and when the diaper

was filled, he may have had to wait for awhile. Finally, the receptionist said "Caleb, it is your turn."

A male nurse who looked to be about 70 lead him to Room 106 and said " We will have someone to 

tend to you in a minute." Two rooms over there was a 24 year old intern from UNC nursing school, 

named Ella. Since Ella was just an intern and was learning from these clinic doctors, she got 

assigned random situations when no other doctor was avalable to deal with them. " Ella, we have

a teen who paid to have two diaper changes. We don't turn away patients, no matter how crazy they 

are. You know the rest of us are working our tails off with all these flu patients, and the 18 year old 

who seems to want to be 17 months old, he needs constant supervision because we do not know

when his diaper will fill up. Since we can't do that, and are all busy, I am asking you to take the

task. You have babysit before. If you feel uncomfortable, imagine you are taking care of a baby. 

I am counting on you. " Ella insisted. " Are you sure there is nobody else who can essentially  

caretake this teen?" She got no reply. With no other choice, she walked into the room, hoping for 

the best. 



                  Caleb waited, anxiously, then he saw the young woman in front of him. She was 

downright stunning, as her brown hair glistened in the hospital room light. " Hello, my name is Ella, 

and until you have used up both of the diaper changes you paid for, i'm here to care for you." All of

the sudden, she no longer felt in a awkward situation. She looked in Caleb's eyes and saw something

different. She soon woke out of her thoughts as the teen responded and said " My name is Caleb. I 

guess you were told why I was here , and are you going to leave me off and on?" Ella then responded 

saying " NO, I am not to leave your sight until your time here is done. And just wondering, is there a 

underlying reason why you are wetting and messing diapers, other than you like to?" After a few 

minutes he told Ella his story. " Ella, It never started this way, and i wish it never ended up this way.

I was born with Autism and for years I wore pull ups to bed as a ritual, part of my nightly pattern. 

Then I found out about being a baby again, and quickly got invovled, and now I want to be diapered 

again. I also do it to deal with emotional pain caused by a psychiatric illness and a violent sister. This

was a way I chose to cope with things." As he talked, Ella's thoughts and opinions on Caleb changed. 

Just then he erupted in a fit of depression and frustration mixed together. " Ella, you think I am crazy 

and find me as uncofrtable! The whole world thinks so, so I probably need to feel the way a big kid 

would feel." And he reached for a needle. " Caleb, you are wrong! Put that down before I have to get 

help. Babies don't self harm. Yes, you are partly correct. That was my first impression. But you

started explaining and pouring your heart out, my first reaction changed. If you want to be a baby, 

i'll go to whatever lengths I can. I will diaper you and whatever. Just please continue still talking in 

your normal talk. And try to not use both diapers because I want you to stay with me till the clinic 

closes. I am here for you. That bag of yours, what does it have in it other than diapers?" It has a 

babyish rose colored romper and a princess pattern one. There is also some changing supplies and a 

pacifier. " he told Ella. " Caleb, you are upset and about to cry. Would you like me to rock you

to slep in my lap? I can slip you into one of those rompers so you will be comfortable." after a soft 

"yes", Ella put him in baby sleeping clothes and sang to the teen baby, as he fell asleep. " Now she 

has a 18 year old, trying to keep him warm trying to keep all the cold when he looks her in the eyes 

he don't know  he's safe  when she says ohh love no ones ever gonna hurt you love, i'm gonna give 

you all of my love nobody maters like you. So rock a bye baby rock a bye i'm gonna rock you

rock a bye troubled baby rock a bye somebody's got you, rock a bye troubled baby rock a bye  

bye, rock a bye. " And just like that, Caleb fell asleep. 

Four hours latter, Ella shook him and said " wake up. It is closing time. And your diaper kinda smells.

I don't want to let you go. Do you have a way home?" Stay strong. People care about you. If you

need me, call me or text me, here's my contact info. I swear to God I will do everything in my 

possible ability to help you." Caleb quietly said " I rode here on my rusty and  red 1989 Yamaha. 

out front. " I can ride home, just let me change clothes. " Ella then said " If you want to be a baby or

whatever, i'm gonna change your clothes. " And she did that. Nobody was left in the office for the 

most part, and the two walked out the building together. " I hope to see you soon, Caleb. Maybe I  

can sneak you into my dorm some time. " Caleb took off, and a few minutes latter Ella did the same. 




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